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"Sheos".- Saturday Feb 2 - 4:24pm
Parenting is mostly saying, "Exactly the words I just said," when your kid asks you, "What do you mean?"- Wednesday Jan 30 - 4:18pm
Being a dad means being the only one snickering when you make a "Stop! Jammie time!" joke to your kids. #pleasehammerdonthurtem- Tuesday Jan 22 - 12:18am
We need a name for when you go to the grocery store and buy none of what you really need at home that is better tha… https://t.co/UVJv637Es5- Friday Jan 11 - 7:53pm
Dad: Go occupy yourself for 5 minutes until it is time for snack.
Kid: (5 seconds later) Um, Daddy?- Friday Jan 11 - 12:57am